Over the last couple of days our country, if only a small land portion, has been affected by a major storm. This storm, while small on the scale how hurricanes are measured, has had a major impact on the lives, property, and landscape of all that came in its path. In looking at the pictures, you can feel the devastation that is being felt by thousands of people.
While I see the property damage of the area affected, my concern is drawn to the lives that were lost directly by the storm. For the last week warnings have been issued and, in the last few days, those warnings were much more specific with regard to location and impact. Many were told to leave. How many deaths can be attributed to those who did not leave? We may never know, but if only one the question has to be asked, “why”, why not heed the advise and counsel? Weather forecasters, government leaders, politicians, newscasters – everyone was saying to get out. Sadly, some did not. Many ignored the direction that they were given that would help them survive.
As a coach, I help people with their finances, their jobs and careers, and their direction in life. Over the years, nothing has been more aggravating and discouraging as when someone(s) will not accept the direction they have asked for. It used to keep me up at night until I learned that I was only responsible for giving people the best help I can give. What people do with the help is their decision. I have had to learn that there are some people I cannot help.
Not long ago I read a book entitled “10 People You Cannot Help!”. Unfortunately, eight of the ten I can directly relate to as a coach.
The titles of each chapter in this small book describe exactly who those people are. Keep in mind, more often than not it is not about me but the person’s overall attitude.
- They Do Not Like Me – This one I can understand. Sometimes, I do not like me either.
- They Do Not Know That They Really Need Help
- They Will Not Do What They Are Told Will Help Them
- They Are Bittter About Their Situation
- They Think They Know More Than You
- They Are Lazy
- They Prefer To Be Pitied
- They Are Not Looking For Help, But Looking For Agreement
Thankfully, there are some who do not use any of those as excuses and make the changes they need to as well as many other changes they did not know were needed. They recognized their need and put aside things that could distract them, take the direction, and begin things anew. They, essentially, listened to the warning and made the adjustments they needed to make.
Where are you? Do you seek and run with the direction you are given as you seek the help you know you need? Or are you one who will disregard the facts at hand and take your chances whatever the cost may be?
You did help me – advised me to live with my daughter and her family rather than continuing to rent a house. Thanks to you, I have a debt-free basement apartment. Had I not listened to you, I would have run out of money long ago and would have had no place to live. I now live on Social Security and alimony. I have been able to hold on to my investments and will soon be receiving a little bit of quarterly income. I have looked and looked for an office job of some kind, but because of my age it has been challenging.
I have learned that it is often the suffering that God allows in our lives that draws us closer to Him. I was created to glorify God with my life no matter what my circumstances!
Thanks again for your counsel four years ago.
(rec’d from former client via email)